My Heart is Full

I know I will not be able to communicate well what I have experienced in the last few days from my little corner of the world but I will try.  I may go back and edit this post in the morning when I am more awake but I wanted to write while I was thinking about it.

My heart is full of emotion for my street, the people, there lives... These very people that drive me mad on a daily basis and they don't even know my name.   I am stuck here most days.  Curtis gets to go to work.  He is much better with people than I.  He tends to have more grace and mercy for those that probably get little.   

Here goes..... It seems like it has rained for days.  Yesterday was so warm.  The pellet stove was off for a full 24 hours.  The first time since October.  Yeah.  The girls wore shorts and of course rubber boots.  So of course I let them play in the dirty, gross, litter ridden mud puddles in the parking lot across from our house.  What was I supposed to do.  Clean and fill the little plastic pool when what they really wanted to do was play in the mud.  Anyways,  this gives the phrase "Livin' in the Lew"  new meaning!  They are so adorable and Anaya was so excited that she had permission to do this, usually she gets yelled at and Kiana is happy to do whatever her older sister is doing.

For over a week we had this truck sitting right in front of our house.  You know, the road is not off limits for whomever wants to park....  Anyways, this truck was filled with trash, stuff that actually looked like it may have come from our old house.  You can see the front of this truck in this picture.  I was so frustrated about this stupid truck.  Monday night the guy came late like 11pm, and drove off. I was so excited but that was short lived as he returned less than 5 minutes later. Parked and drove off with his girlfriend.  Hellooooo! People live here, with kids, and groceries, and garbage, (thank-you very much they didn't pick it up cuz they couldn't see it past your stupid truck) and a front door that works with a back door that is on it's last leg.   You get the picture.  So what do you do... You embrace it.  You take a picture, document your feelings and let your kids play in the mud.

He came back on Thursday started the truck and then took the keys back out and left.  I was getting beyond grumpy.  Finally, later, after a week and a half of looking at that horrible truck.....he left!

Today in this very same parking lot an angry man came driving through with his truck, making sure to kick up as much dirt and mud as possible while making his statement.  I was about to make my statement to him.  You see I had my kids outside as did many other parents this evening.  I was getting ready to go see Renee perform in a play she was in and was getting the littles in the car.  I was quite irritated at him for being so reckless as I was leaving I stopped at the stop sign and looked out my window only to notice him hugging his little boy tightly while the boys mom looked on waiting for him to be handed over. (as did many of mom's neighbors who were waiting in the street -watching)I now understood his frustration.  The brokenness around here is incredible.  What about that family who cares for them. Who will be there for the little boy, for the mom, and yes, the dad too.  We are definitely hands and feet around here.  Now, I understand that this is just my take on it.

Let's end on a happy note and pretend no bad things happen around here.  Kiki is so cute!

Now it's time for me to check the locks and go to bed.  I won't pretend for too long that bad things don't happen around here.
                                                                                                                                                              

Beauty

Basilica of St. Peter and Paul is in the heart of downtown Lewiston.  It's beautiful!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It has been a long winter here in Lewiston.  People are getting a little edgy, a little depressed, and yes some may be a lot depressed.   A friend said tonight, (in the context of being tired and the long winter), if it's not bad enough that we've had a long winter - it's hard to find beauty in this city.   Well, that may be true.  But one needs to look for it.   They need to look through the addict who throws his needles out the window and to the guy who has devoted his life to addiction counseling.  They need to look through the trashed filled yards to the yard that is meticulously kept planted with perennials.  They need to look past the young people fighting, swearing wearing 42's when they should be sporting a 29 to the old couple that has sat on that same porch for over 50 years watching their street, their block and their city change before them.

Today is Good Friday.  Jesus walked a road that no one would have chose to free a people that only he could love.   What better way to spend this day then reflecting on all that I see on my block and all that Jesus had done for me,  for them.   Who am I to judge anyone's downfalls.  I am here to serve, learn, grow and be Jesus to someone that needs to meet him.  

On Sunday we'll be putting out over 260 Easter eggs for the kids on our block.  I hope they show up.  I'm not sure if we'll be here or not, we may be at church.  But I hope that some of these kids will feel Jesus love them even if it is taking a bite of a chocolate or placing a well meaning sticker on their parents wall.  Yes, I hope even the over developed young girl that I observed warning a very young girl away from her older boyfriend can be a child on Easter and partake in the frivolous adventure of an egg hunt.

My friend told me today that I need to start interceding for these neighbors of mine that seem to drive me crazy at times.  So I thought you may like to join in......
Please keep in prayer the young couple who just had a baby and also have  a toddler.  He yells a lot and she is quiet.  Pray for the drug dealer,  the disabled couple, the alcoholic, the new couple with the new baby that just moved in - that they won't get caught up in the drama.... these are just some of those we are here to serve and never would have thought of a year ago.  It is for them that Jesus walked that road of agony.

A Good Work

As I get older I feel that I am becoming more immovable in my ideals, beliefs, and I suppose this is what constitutes the essence of who I am.   Take me or leave me. 

I love the whole book of Philippians.  Thank's Marv for making us memorize it in Bible School.  It just makes sense the way Paul moves through his theme woven throughout the book.  It was my first real experience with memorizing a passage that made more and more sense as I became more and more familiar with it.   I particularly love the first chapter.  It is so personable, kind, and just overall spoken with love to the people on his heart.

I love this city, even though......the job is huge......the people are shall I say sometimes confrontational, loud, messy, friendly, smiley, playful, unaware...(but aren't we all)

I cleaned my yard last Friday, and guess what?  I have greening grass.  Sweet!


My heart and soul have been up and down these last couple weeks.  It has been constant hard work for me without a break.  I am still not unpacked and have no plans to be for a while. The little's are very busy playing, fighting, destroying, crying, eating, eating, eating.... I find myself searching the house for that smell that i can't quite identify, usually to no avail.  There are meals to make, kids to drive, homework to help with (although I'm sorry to say I think my kids are surpassing my intellect!)  People to chase out of the yard, lessons to teach the thieving children(God bless their little souls.... :)  If you've ever lived in a tribal situation you get what I am saying.  It's a free for all out here!

You may wonder if I am happy to be in my house, on my street living here in the downtown - ABSOLUTELY!  I wouldn't have it any other way, but however,  I may have a touch of culture shock!  I would expect this in the jungle of Venezuela but not so much in the jungle of Lewiston.

Anyways, keep my rants in perspective please.....  Now to Philippians - my thought for today

 ³ I thank my God every time I remember you. ⁴ In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy ⁵ because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, ⁶ being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
 ⁷ It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart and, whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God’s grace with me. ⁸ God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus.
 ⁹ And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, ¹⁰ so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, ¹¹ filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.

Thanks to Curtis I have a real appreciation for all that labor in this town.  There are so many great churches of all different denominations working together for the same goal of reaching the lost.  In so doing people are getting fed, children are getting loved, parents are getting counsel, homes are getting repaired, people are getting jobs,  relationships are forming and so on and so forth. 

He who has started a good work in me will see it through until completion.  (hopefully my house as well..  hahaha)


Here is just a taste of the good work going on my home.  It was so special that I just couldn't help but take a little video and share it with you all.

What you don't see......

What I don't see inside my house

junk
trash
dirty diapers from my dear neighbor next door
filth
crap...literally...in my backyard
not mine
I take care of my own stuff

The over developed little girl hanging out with boys almost twice her age.
The underdeveloped little boy next door who can't speak a sentence, wearing diapers and he's over 4.
The woman who is always getting yelled at by her boyfriend.  She has a toddler and a brand new baby.
The person who stole my plywood and in so doing may have caused a wonderful God fearing woman to slip in the mud and go to the emergency room.
The broken family on the corner who walk their kids to school everyday.  They no longer love each other but live together for the kids.
The hungry kid who only eats at school.
The kid that walks to school everyday abandoned by those who are supposed to care for him.
The man who walks through my yard looking for bottles that are thrown there by my neighbors.  So kind of them to take care of their own poor.  Now he looks in my window because I gave him my bottles one day after hollering at him for going through the trash in my yard put their by others. (at least that day I was paying attention)

What is my problem?

My mind is spinning with what used to my life and what is my life today.  What do I need, what do I want.

Seriously, would you want to hang out here.
It looks dark, and muddy, and dead.  But soon in just a few short weeks the grass will be green, our plants will be budding and life will be popping up all around us.  It's there under the dirty diapers, under the walmart bags, under the green tarp, under the ice, mud and snow.   If you look you can see.  If you dig you may even find signs of life.  But don't be too rough you  may ruin it.  (hmmm I think there is another lesson in there...)


Time to look out your window and maybe step outside the comfort zone of your home and maybe your life.  

Time for me to clean my yard!